(Perhaps) The Happiest Place on Earth

Sunday, October 30, 2016

Perhaps the happiest place on earth is not really a place: physically, structurally, constructively. It's a state of mind. Whether you embrace it or not. Whether you stick to it or not. Whether you cling on it or not.

My visual thesis defence day just got postponed to next Friday from Tuesday, due to a reason. Maybe it's a bad thing for me, because: 1) I can't stand waiting with all of these uncertainties, and insecurity. I just want it to be done and let all of these weights on my shoulder to begone. 2) I recently booked plane tickets and room reservation for my upcoming trip (and final exhibition preparation) to Yogyakarta, which I unfortunately decide to leave on next Wednesday. Since the thesis defence is on a Friday, I should wave my goodbyes to all those tickets.

In the other hand, it's a good thing, because: 1) I can spark up my thesis writing. Or maybe add some few other things in my progress book. I honestly didn't spend that much time with my thesis writing, instead I put too much efforts in the visual works. I can feel that the divine deity gave me the chance to do some more efforts in my writing. 2) I can do some petty preparations for the presentation, maybe?

In the end, she chooses to believe that all things happen for some good yet unpredictable reasons and be happy; Creating the state of mind, or perhaps creating the happiest place on earth.

Photos are taken at Tokyo DisneySea, Japan, on July 2016.
All images © 2013-2016 Claudia Novreica


Sunday, October 23, 2016

It's one week to the visual thesis defence. Yes, only a week left for me to prepare all the things necessary. Instead, I write a blog post (which isn't surprising; it's the thing I always do when it comes to dealing with upcoming deadlines) *smirk*.

I can't feel anything. I feel numb. These past two months of final project execution has turned me into a robot that also in need of good foods and sleep. I turned into a hermit; someone who never intend to leave his nesting place. Someone who's constantly philosophise; concerning whys and hows. The one who doesn't give any damn about currents. A hikikomori for good causes.

In other ways, I feel everything. I feel every complex processes of the universe inside of me. I feel nauseous by thinking of every single chances that might happen on the d-day. I feel insecure about my work, because I'm pretty sure I could've make it better. I feel so restless, in spite of amount of sleep hours I obtain every nights. I feel elated, knowing I'm coming to the end of my university life. I feel every single things.

Perhaps this is that another weird, yet familiar paradox that I usually encounter in my life. Something that's confusing, but I can truly understand. An enemy, yet a best friend. I've been in too many paradoxes, enantiosemy, antilogy, addad, and I'm sure this too shall pass.

Anyways, whenever I feel unmotivated to do anything, I look on my past travel shots. It reminds me to break a freaking leg and try to ace everything I'm doing. Seriously, I can't wait for another trips. Another surprises. Another breakthroughs. Another earthshaking movements. Plus, I miss my times in Hogwarts already. Sigh.

All is well. All is well. All is well.

Photos are taken at Universal Studios Japan, Osaka, Japan on July 2016.
All images © 2013-2016 Claudia Novreica

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