{ a perpetual goodwill and beautiful thinking }

Delirium


It's one week to the visual thesis defence. Yes, only a week left for me to prepare all the things necessary. Instead, I write a blog post (which isn't surprising; it's the thing I always do when it comes to dealing with upcoming deadlines) *smirk*.

I can't feel anything. I feel numb. These past two months of final project execution has turned me into a robot that also in need of good foods and sleep. I turned into a hermit; someone who never intend to leave his nesting place. Someone who's constantly philosophise; concerning whys and hows. The one who doesn't give any damn about currents. A hikikomori for good causes.

In other ways, I feel everything. I feel every complex processes of the universe inside of me. I feel nauseous by thinking of every single chances that might happen on the d-day. I feel insecure about my work, because I'm pretty sure I could've make it better. I feel so restless, in spite of amount of sleep hours I obtain every nights. I feel elated, knowing I'm coming to the end of my university life. I feel every single things.

Perhaps this is that another weird, yet familiar paradox that I usually encounter in my life. Something that's confusing, but I can truly understand. An enemy, yet a best friend. I've been in too many paradoxes, enantiosemy, antilogy, addad, and I'm sure this too shall pass.
  

Anyways, whenever I feel unmotivated to do anything, I look on my past travel shots. It reminds me to break a freaking leg and try to ace everything I'm doing. Seriously, I can't wait for another trips. Another surprises. Another breakthroughs. Another earthshaking movements. Plus, I miss my times in Hogwarts already. Sigh.

All is well. All is well. All is well.
_

Photos are taken at Universal Studios Japan, Osaka, Japan on July 2016.
All images © 2013-2016 Claudia Novreica

6 comments

  1. Most importantly when it comes to thesis, don't overthink it. Just like all your previous classes, you'll pass it. Love your illustration btw! cheers!

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    1. I'm trying to keep relaxed! Haha! Thanks for the advice, Ko Firman! Cheers! :)

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  2. Everything will go well, dear :) I was feel it too for sure. Just remember to do do do do your best and pray. He knows how hard you fight. Feeling anxious and thinking a thousand bad 'how ifs' it's normal. I was there too.

    May the universe and your prays and hardworks paid off. Godbless your thesis!

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    1. Thank you so much Jan for the wishes! I'll do my best for it! I'm sure it will go well! x

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  3. So, after one week, just make vacation plan dear, your hectic days are over and you deserve to have some holiday, but first of all, please do the best for your final project! All is well :)

    xoxo,

    |CHELSHEAFLO BLOG|
    |INSTAGRAM|

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    1. Oh my gosh, you just read my mind! xD
      I just booked a ticket back to my hometown so I can relax for a bit while preparing for the upcoming year-end exhibition. xD
      Thank you for keeping me on spirit, I feel so much relaxed by now! Cheers! x

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